An unexpected fall that lands your father in the hospital with a broken hip, your mother wanders off one day, or just a sudden realization your parents are no longer able to look after themselves and are at risk.

No one likes to think about a loved one growing old and the inevitable events that follow.  We're not good at those 'difficult conversations' and tend to live in a bubble with our denial putting off planning for the future.  But all too often our bubble bursts unexpectedly.

An overwhelming flood of emotions such as guilt of not planning ahead, fear of losing them, helplessness as you watch them suffer. Whatever the circumstances, just remember to breath and relax.  A simple checklist will give you a focal point to start:

• Talk to your parent.  Let them maintain as much control of their lives as possible.   The more you can consult with them the smoother your transition into caregiving will be

• Compile relevant information - prescriptions, medical coverage, physicians, insurance policies, attorney, and information about their medical condition

• Call a family meeting with immediate and extended family members involving them as early as possible.

• Find out all you can about local community resources.  Check out senior centers, home help, state programs, and home health agencies.

One option is to hire a certified geriatric care manager.  They are trained to quickly asses the situation and will be able to direct you to local services, legal and home care assistance programs. There is a cost involved but in the long run they could save you valuable time and resources. 

Most importantly, don't be afraid to ask for help.  Caregivers that suffer the most are those who suffer in silence. Lean on family and friends to spread the load in this time of crisis.

Listed below are links to articles and resources to assist you.  With the right frame of mind this crisis could turn into the most rewarding time of your life.  And remember, we are setting an example for our children and they are watching.